I want to say something, words fail me... I try to write, my mind fails me.. Is it so hard to coin together a few alphabets? I viewed someones blog today and my inability to write one, pierced through me a deep hole.. So.. Here I am... Trying to 'fit in' when I don't belong.. Forcing myself when I don't want it.. I like to write, yes I do.. But what? Its lame to copy-paste created work.. What is it that 'I' want? I don't know! Who knows then? Do you? Does He?
He! Is He a fragment of my imaginations? Presenting vivid hallucinations and delusions, I wonder if I'm schizophrenic.. Those are the symptoms, ain't they?
I refuse to stand before the idol at home, declaring with a loud and stern voice, "belief should come from within".. My mind retaliates this voice.. I stand before the same idol I deny many time over, in dire straits... I bow my head, tears streaming down my face, and pray... Pray hard and honest... Pray for me, for the people around me...
And I said I can't write.. Its a funny thing, language... And your mind... Racing thoughts never leave your side, and you should not deny it its existence...